By Pastor Doug Batchelor
“Whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). In other words, if you’re looking at pornography, you aren’t being faithful to your spouse or to
God’s law. And this doesn’t apply just to men. It includes women who might lust after men, as with Potiphar’s wife.
“It came to pass… that his master’s wife cast longing eyes on Joseph, and she said, ‘Lie with me’ ” (Genesis 39:7). And remember how David’s affair with Bathsheba started: “It happened one evening that David … walked on the roof of the king’s house. And from the roof he saw a woman bathing, and the woman was very beautiful to behold. So David sent and inquired about the woman” (2 Samuel 11:2, 3). For both David and Potiphar’s wife, a lustful act began with a lustful look. (It’s unfortunate, but in this day and age I should mention this principle includes men who lust after other men and women who lust for other women.)
According to Jesus, to engage in sexual thoughts while looking upon another person other than your spouse is a mental form of adultery. Sin is not just an action; it’s an attitude. “Blessed are the pure in heart, For they shall see God” (Matthew 5:8). Let me be clear: it is not a sin to be tempted with a sexual thought or to merely look upon an attractive person. Everyone, including Jesus, has been tempted through our eyes. So if a man notices an attractive woman wearing provocative clothing, his first notice of her does not mean he has sinned. Rather, it’s the lingering look and the imagining of sinful possibilities that is sin. Job, a married man, said, “I
have made a covenant with my eyes; Why then should I look upon a young woman?” (Job 31:1). It’s easy to conclude, therefore, that viewing pornography is a sin of adultery. What is “adultery”? It is any sex outside of the marriage bond. The seventh commandment prohibits this kind of sex. But why is adultery wrong? Maybe that’s the question we really need to answer. Before we do that, we need to know the purpose of sex.
Sex is a wonderful gift God gave married couples for several reasons: to give and receive affection, for reproduction, and to increase intimacy and bonding. God gave us sex to be enjoyed in marriage because it
helps strengthen the emotional and spiritual bonds between husband and wife.
This bonding is only appropriate between two people committed to a lifelong relationship. Creating these strong bonds outside of marriage can lead to heartbreak and pain. So He commands us to abstain from making these bonds with sex outside of a committed marriage relationship. Pornography totally contradicts God’s purposes for sex. Even if viewed with the permission of a spouse, it can’t help but lead to separation and confusion. Pornography portrays a highly distorted and debased image of sex that can cause problems in your current or future relationships. You are changed by what you behold; pornography will change your
marriage for the worse. If you realize that you have a problem with pornography, pray for victory and consider finding help. Along with Christian counselors, there are a number of biblical resources and ministries that can help you free yourself from the terrible bondage of pornography.
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